Dad, do I have to sit here with you? I feel really awkward watching mom try on lingerie.

Typical day of shopping with women.

Bart: You think he knows I'm gay? (in his mind)

Dad: I think he's gay... (in his mind)

At this point, Danny knew the "talk" was coming.

So watching paint dry really is this fun.

Welcome to Jews R Us, where a Jew can be a Jew

You're hair might be nice and straight now, But when she sinks her claws in you, you'll look like a chia pet.

What every you do don't say she looks FAT!!!!!

they knew they'd have to flip a coin to see who would wear the baby blue suit!!!

I'm sorry if people think we're deeply mired in a homosexual statutory rape case.

$11 and all i got was this lousy haircut

If you are wandering what that feeling is i can heal. Its a little bit of you dieing son.

thanks dad.

this ride is boring

" You know son, I rented one just like that powder blue number back in the day"
" I know you did dad, but all it got you was mon"

Tuxedo models, not as interesting as Victoria Secret models

Somehow, I always knew that you were gay, Dad.

dad for the love of god!!!! stop playing with yourself!!!

uh uh ah ah ....THEY SAID BOOB!!... uh uh aha ha

It is extremely difficult to write entertaining captions without profanity, and be funny.

Dad, man-boobs just aren't in like they used to be. I'm going to stop taking the estrogen.

"No really...you're gonna like the way you look. I GUARANTEE IT!"

The guys who did'nt make it to for the final casting of Wedding Crashers.

Tuxedos always look good when they're worn by a stripper.

Wow Dad, this is a really nice couch.

im sorry you had to find out i was gay here danny

DAD: Now that you know how IT'S done.. Do you still want that room bart!

BART: No, you take it, and do that thing you do with mom.. I'm going to go play in traffic to clear my mind!

Danny knew that he would have to tell his father that he was taking a man to prom.

Thanks for telling me about you prom night, i think im going to go throw up.

It was at that point that Bart regretted his pledge to lose his virginity by any means possible.

Are your pants riding up the crotch? "Cause mine are trying to "divide and conquer'...

Okay...So apparetntly this is a pile of garbage bags, not a couch. Disgusting, though I am relieved we found where the rotten fish smell was coming from.

It's nice to see the kid with the jew-fro from 40 Year Old Virgin all grown up and with kids of his own, now.

Dad, why do you always have to dress like a Jehovah's Witness? We're Presbyterian for the love of God!

"Danny..."
"Nope, I still haven't forgiven you for that 'You're an Ass-man' comment yet. Resume not speaking..."

Dad, I still don't think this is the best place to pick up chicks.

Dad: Well, here we are. What kind of dress do you want.
Son: Nothing too flashy, I don\'t want to look slutty.

Damn, how about her for a prom date

Dad: You sure you still want to go through with this?

Danny: As ready as I can be. But...I'm not sure how we start.

Dad: Well...do you want to pitch or catch?

I liked the maroon one.

Women are like suits, you can find them anywhere and everywhere, but those are usually the ugly ones.

What are we going to do? They had the powder blue, but we need the orange tux to go as Harry and Lloyd from Dumb and Dumber.

I'VE NEVER SEEN ANOTHER MAN'S PENIS BEFORE!

This is DEFINITELY gonna be the most awkward lap dance EVER...

At the Men's Wearhouse I guarantee you will look good........nope, scratch that.

So... Mom was a Stripper when you met her?!

Dad, i have to tell you something. I had a Dirty dream about mom...

Just ignore that creepy bride and groom and maybe they will go away.

Bart: I Wish I Had An Afro... (in his mind)

Yeh, dad. The ping pong ball trick is amazing. But, in a tux shop? Really?

If we had only hidden the dress better...

Dad, when I grow up, I want to have a 'fro just like you!

id tap that

oh seth youd tap that? you think youre so cool with your jew fro

Dad: ..... unhuh ......

Danny: ..... yep .....

Bart: Maybe It'd Be Easier To Get A Date With An Afro Like My Dad (In His Mind)

Dad: Are The Mannequins Still Watching? (Whispers)

Danny: Maybe It'd Be Easier To Get A Date With An Afro Like My Dad (In His Mind)

(Fixed Mistake)

Danny: I Wish I Had An Afro... (in his mind)

(Fixed Mistake)

One cup?

What the deuce? I thought my dad was Christopher Walken!

WillHMacy: "Did you tell the tailor you dont need that much room in the crouch area? because of your........you know."
Danny- Yeah

Not going anywhere for a while?...try a snickers!

son, thats a suit that'll get ya' laid...

I don't care what they say. Watching men put on tuxedoes is sexually arousing.

Dad: Son, I never knew we could have this much fun together.
Son: I know dad. Today has been great. First we had luch, know we are picking out a tux, and then we get to go and get ice cream!
Dad: Wait what? I was kidding. This has been the worst day of my life. Scratch that, the worst was the day I found out I knocked your mother up.
Son: Speechless and sobbing...

Oops picked the wrong baby, you aren't my son. Bart is. And Bart's got a room.

"so at that point I had to do something, I mean who knew a hooker could do thaqt with her asshole, Please don't tell your mother"

Dad: You're so lazy son. I don't know who you get it from.

Dad: So, I heard you got a room.

Son: Yep...